virgin islands scene

The only man who is really free is the one who can turn down an invitation to dinner without giving an excuse.
-- Jules Renard
 

 

Wednesday, October 30, 2002

Improve the situation

Every time you complain about something, whether silently to yourself or out loud to others, you tie yourself more firmly to it. Complaints direct your energy toward perpetuating the very things about which you’re complaining.

There is a far more effective approach, and that is to propose a positive alternative, and to set about putting it into practice. While a complaint merely reinforces what is wrong, a positive alternative sets about to actually change the situation for the better.

Complaints, because of their negative nature, are usually met with some degree of defensiveness. Positive alternatives, on the other hand, tend to more naturally be met with cooperation and appreciation.

The next time you have the urge to complain, stop and ask yourself what it is you really want. Do you simply want to complain or do you want to do something that’s going to improve the situation?

Most complaints stem from a genuine desire to improve the situation, but usually the complaint itself is not enough to do that. So go beyond the complaint and use that energy to truly make a positive difference.

Rather than aggravating a bad situation with your complaints, transform it with your positive thoughts, ideas and actions.

— Ralph Marston

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Copyright ©2002 Ralph S. Marston, Jr. All Rights Reserved. The Daily Motivator is provided for your personal, non-commercial use only. Other than personal sharing, please do not re-distribute without permission.