virgin islands scene

Only passions, great passions can elevate the soul to great things.
-- Denis Diderot


Sunday, February 11, 1996

If only . . .

If only I could win the lottery. If only I could get a new job. If only I could find a husband. If only I could get new carpet. If only I could save some money. If only I could lose some weight. If only my bills were paid. If only my family would understand.

Life is full of “if onlys". They greet us each day, and tuck us into bed at night. They flavor every decision we make. They fill us with regret and frustration. Worst of all, they completely mislead us and give us permission to NOT live up to our potential.

"If only” is a great excuse, especially if it’s something totally out of your control. “If only the economy wasn’t so bad.” There’s not much we can do about that one, and so it’s easy to blame for all our problems.

"If only” keeps us out of life. “If only I had a better dress to wear, I could go to the party.” Right, Cinderella? “If only” keeps us waiting on the sidelines of life.

Do you want to ever get anywhere in life? Then forget about “if only". Stop making excuses and start making progress. Is there something that’s holding you back? Then get it out of your way.

Anthony Robbins has a great technique for getting past stumbling blocks such as “if only.” He says to “put it behind you” -- literally! If there’s something that’s holding you back, then take it and look at it in your mind. See it manifest itself in your mind’s eye. Then start to make it smaller. Shrink it more and more and notice that you start to feel better about it. Then imagine that you’re driving your car on the Interstate highway, and you drop this stumbling block out the window. As you whiz past, look out the car window and you’ll see your stumbling block laying there on the road. Next, imagine yourself speeding away from it. It gets smaller and smaller in the rearview mirror. Now imagine that it is five miles behind you. As you get farther away from it, it becomes less and less significant.

You are literally, and powerfully, “putting it out of your mind.” You’re freeing yourself from the hold of “if only” and allowing yourself to transcend your limitations.

— Ralph Marston

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Copyright ©1996 Ralph S. Marston, Jr. All Rights Reserved. The Daily Motivator is provided for your personal, non-commercial use only. Other than personal sharing, please do not re-distribute without permission.